2002-01-18 - 7:56 p.m. - What is Love

"Love is a many splendared thing". Whoever wrote that, was not joking. In response to attempt to shed some light on a recent post I came across, I'm going to try to define love. I know, the best description is I Corinthians 13, but after almost 8 years of marriage, how do I know that I'm still in love with my husband?

Well, to be honest, the idea of being without him doesn't send me into convulsive sobs, so that's not it. He doesn't give me butterflies when he looks at me. I don't get all excited when I see him in all his morning glory. ;) But I do love him. Those tender moments just resting in each other's arms. The joy of having him for my best friend. Knowing that no man on this earth will ever love our girls the way he does. The history we have that gives us common memories and experiences. The plans that we make for the future. But is there a feeling? A moment that I can put my finger on as saying, that, that was love? One comes to mind.

February 14, 1994, we decided to elope. We went and got a marriage license and paid to have a JP show up on Saturday morning to marry us. We had already planned a wedding for June, but didn't want to wait anymore. In our barely post-pubescent minds, we'd continue to live with our respective parents, just be married. It made perfect sense, at the time. Friday night, DH calls to tell me that his parents have found out and are all upset about it. As it was late, and I was tired, I hung up on him. Anyway, the next day, the parents (mine & his) called a meeting to discuss everything. They were big on the why we wanted to rush it part. Those of you who know us well, will know. But basically, we were given 3 options by the parents. One, we could break up entirely. Two, we could married during the 30 days the marriage license was valid. Third, we could wait until June as initially planned. At that moment in time, my mind took a picture. There, in front of both our families, I turned to Todd and said with such amazing calm, I love Todd and want to marry him during the next 30 days. On March 12, 1994, we were married in front of 60 of our closest friends, but mostly family.

Have there been other points in time I've known I loved him? Probably, but none so intense. The truth is, I know I love him, because I don't want to break up with him. That was always the marker for me growing up. I doubted I'd ever get married because I would date a guy a couple of weeks, get bored, and want out. Does he love me. He has to, or he'd have left YEARS ago! :) There's not another explanation for putting up with all my hitches and hang-ups.

Well, I've got to spend all day tomorrow doing Pampered Chef stuff, so I'd better get going.

Until next time....